I have to say that recently life has felt more difficult than normal. Nothing in particular is causing it to be so, I just feel it. Maybe it’s because of the changes I’m making to the business, maybe it’s because my husband hurt his knee, maybe it’s because Achilles, my dog, is getting older, maybe it’s because I’m getting older. It could be the sum of everything or not enough breathing room in my schedule. Maybe I’m just overreacting. But in the midst of all, I find myself craving writing time more and more. My artwork has become such a heavy weight to carry, the dissatisfaction with my portfolio is a constant reminder that I haven’t been producing enough. The constant doubt can drive one crazy. To balance the stress of my art, writing brings so much pleasure. Perhaps because I don’t have to worry about making money from it. While my art turned into my job, and now it no longer serves the purpose to relax me, but a way to pay my bills. I don’t think it’s a bad thing, to mix business and pleasure, but it’s a fine line between the two, and sometimes it seems impossible to stay balanced. And all of that, makes me both thankful and fearful, that my writing for now is just for pleasure.
Thanks for reading.